Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
