You're my little dorito
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
