seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
