He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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