I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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