I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Randomize