On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
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