I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
