i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Randomize
