My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Randomize