my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
