Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
