you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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