"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize