I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I need a beard to bite.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
