i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
