Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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