Just fell off a train. Bad.
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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
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