But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize