Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
You made out with two different species that night
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
