hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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