ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
i need some magic done to my vagina
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
