love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize