Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
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