would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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