i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
