I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
