Having a random hookup so left but love u
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
