I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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