No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
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