my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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