Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
