found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
I just cut my nipple shaving
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
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