I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
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