Kiss
Puke
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Randomize
