lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
As shirtless as possible
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Randomize
