kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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