Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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