Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
it hurts more in the daytime
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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