Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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