goodnight i made you a song goodbye
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize