Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Randomize
