Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
