Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Randomize
