I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
My ass is underappreciated
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
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