Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
you're hired as official boob wrangler
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
