so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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