I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
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