Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
