I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
